Mars may be the billionaire fantasy destination of the century, but according to one very committed psychic, robots will take all the seats, rig the system, and leave humans stuck on Earth with compost bins and bad Wi-Fi. A sarcastic deep dive into our truly unhinged future.

A new therapy program sends you into a tiger enclosure to achieve “inner peace”—or at least forget your other problems. Raw meat, apex predators, and personal growth collide in the wildest mental-health trend yet.

Sick of your neighbor’s blinding holiday light display? Discover the totally reasonable, absolutely mature solution: unleash energy-guzzling AI tools to overwhelm the grid and bring silent nights back to your life. A festive guide in pure sarcasm.

Standing seats, airborne subway vibes, and $5 flights: airlines have finally brought New York’s rush-hour experience to the skies. Comfort not included.

After the recent tariffs on imported beans, our great nation has finally taken control of its caffeine destiny with a 12-square-mile artificial island next to Hawaii, known officially as Kopetopia. Debt, deregulation and denial make it possible: domestically grown coffee beans for every American.

Winter is rolling in with a fresh crop of new potholes. So this winter, grab a shovel, a reflective vest, and join the movement of DIY repair